Showing posts with label school. Show all posts
Showing posts with label school. Show all posts

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: I hate group projects! 
There was a group paper to write for my Data Mining class, and this one girl would never get in touch with the rest of us, or even come to classes. So, my friend and I worked on the main content of the paper. Then, this girl finally emails the Friday before it’s due and says, “I’m happy to do whatever parts that are left!”, which is just the intro and conclusion. So we let her do it, even though it’s such an unfair contribution. 
And two weeks after that, we also have a 15 minute presentation. And again, no reply or contact to our multiple texts. So my friend and I do the powerpoint. And we also tell the professor what’s been going with her. He says he’ll do group evaluations in the last class, but we’ll see what happens.
Anyway, she texted us yesterday saying, “Have you started on the presentation? I’m happy to put it together or do whatever parts are left!” Pretty much the same thing she sent when we were mostly done the paper. My friend and I were hoping she was just not going to come to the last class. Ughhh, she makes me so mad!! Stop leeching of our hard work!! My friend and I were hoping she was just not going to come to the last class.
Just one more day, and I won’t have to deal with her again.

I finished my last exam on Wednesday. It's an understatement  to say it didn't go well. But, I've become strangely resistant to that feeling now, and it's worrying.

I knew how important it was that I did well, but I still didn't put in the effort. Others can say that you worked hard, but I'm the only one who knows, right? I did work hard, but at the same time, I also lost my motivation, so in the end it would probably not be seen as hard work.

The one thing I wanted the most, the one thing that I honestly had been 100% sure that I would be able to get at the beginning of this year, was destroyed by me.

Still, there is a slight chance, however tiny it may be. I am safe for now, but, if I sabotage myself again, then I won't be able to go. So, I can't fool around in the summer.

I have a lot of fears and uncertainties going through my mind right now, about which I want to talk to someone. I don't think it'll help, seeing as they can only offer either comforting words or false hope. Also, I'm afraid that once I voice them out, they will become real, and it won't be as easy to pass off as me over-thinking something.

I have my last exam tonight, so obviously I was studying very hard yesterday! I found a quiet study room in my university and I just studied for 4 or 5 hours straight. Soon, it was time to go home, and I had to go to the washroom. While I was washing my hands, I looked at my reflection, and got a huge shock!

MY RIGHT EYE WAS COMPLETELY RED! I freaked out so much..! What the heck happened to my eye? My eyes were irritated all day, but I thought it was from lack of sleep! Maybe I was too stressed and blood vessels had broken underneath..! But, yeah, I freaked out and immediately called my mum! She sounded a little worried too, and said that she would take me to the doctor when she picked me up from the bus station.

As usual, the bus was late, and I had about an hour and a half (including wait time) to sit there and worry about what was going on with my eye. I seriously think I'm a hypochondriac. I just kept going through all these scenarios in my head about what it could be, but I suppose none of them were "realistic".

Anyways, I got picked up at the bus station, and we went to the clinic. Everyone did a double take at my eye, and then they tried not to stare at it. -_- I mean, I checked in the mirror, after I got in the car, and it wasn't as red as before! After waiting for 5-10 minutes, I got to see a doctor. Lol, he took one look at my eye and made a diagnosis in 10 seconds. He said that it was an infection and I should use anti-bacterial eye drops.I wonder how it happened. I don't carry around a hand sanitizer and clean my hands every minute, but it's not like my hands are filthy! Maybe I somehow caught from another person.. ><

Either way, I'm keeping my distance from people for now. I've been doing that for a while since I didn't want to catch the flu or the cold from people.

Time to continue studying. I've been so unmotivated this year..! But one good thing did happen yesterday! I handed in my application for the exchange! Yay~ and in 2 weeks or so, they're going to start the interviews! I have to prepare for that!

Haha, I've noticed that pretty much all my recent posts have been about me complaining about something, but why not? :P
It's my blog, so here I am complaining about being under stress again!
Although, it's usually my fault that I put myself under stress by slacking off.
Here's all the things I did to currently raise my stress level so high:

  1. Obviously, I procrastinated, by not doing my readings/practice problems on time.
  2. Why, oh why did I value entertainment during such an important time?! Maybe I should block YouTube until next week, and Facebook, of course
  3. Two tests within 12 hours of each other this week, and also good thing that my essay due on Wed got delayed to next week 
  4. Skipping classes to study, then not studying
  5. NO SLEEEEEEP~ (Very little sleep, actually) I've been a tired little zombie for the past few weeks. The 30-40 minutes of sleep time I get on the bus is not enough -_- 
  6. Not eating right either
  7. Excessive internets that is not related to studying..! 
Well, there's probably more stuff, but I'm running out of time before I have to go catch the train, so it's time to go. I've been really bad the past few weeks, and I ended up skipping classes. Of course, there was a legitimate reason for the week before last, when I sprained my ankle AGAIN! *sigh* 

Time to pack up quickly and leave..  >_<


So it's been a month already since university started, and things are busier than ever! D: Not that it's stopping me from procrastinating.. which is a very very bad habit. -_-

But I really shouldn't! This year is super important, as in I have to work really hard and bring my grades up! BECAUSE:

              来年、日本に留学したい!

And also learn more French. 

Even now, while I'm just listening to music while waiting to go to the bus station, I could easily just start doing some readings right? But no, I'm not.. 

I think I will do it for sure on the bus though! I don't get how I'm able to concentrate so easily in the library or the cafeteria, but it's nearly impossible to do so at home. Of course, it's the temptation of my laptop... 

Well, definitely can't waste next week! I'm so glad it's reading week.. I used to laugh at the idea of having a reading week a month after school started, but it really is necessary! 

I think I should go start to get ready since my bus leaves in 20 mins and I'm still in my pajamas. 


About this blog

I'm A~
24 years old
I just wanted a blog to post random stuff~
よろぴくね~

Followers